How to Make Mediation and Divorce Work

When two people cannot reach an agreement on their own, a third party can be used to hear both sides and work with each person to achieve a compromise. Mediation is a process used when parents disagree on decisions that revolve around raising their children after a divorce. This can mean discussing each parent’s preferences for child custody, child support, or visitation schedules. Talk to an Oklahoma City divorce lawyer if you have experienced trouble with this process.

What Happens During Mediation?

You and your former partner will meet with a mediator in a formal setting. This setting will probably take place in what is called a Family Mediation Center. The mediator is a neutral third person who is trained to listen equally to both sides, address the concerns of each person, and engage in tactics that increase productive communication. The goal is to achieve consensus on a Parenting Agreement that both parents favor.

This Parent Agreement will address what type of child custody is desired, a schedule for when the parent will take their turn in raising the children, which parent the children will stay with during holidays, and which parent will take the child to the other parent’s house. This agreement will be signed by both parents and will be sent to a court for approval. However, if disagreement continues, a trial will be scheduled by the court.

Tips for Effective Mediation

It is common for former marriage partners to experience a reemergence of problems that led to the divorce when they attempt negotiations. This is what some couples expect to happen, despite the fact that successful mediation correlates with emotional satisfaction and living up to the needs of children. The first thing you need to know is that hesitation and negative feelings towards mediation is a normal part of the process.

Common emotions that couples experience right before a divorce are anxiety, fear, and anger. These feelings can make negotiating seem impossible, but have patience. It will take time for these aversive feelings to subside. This is why mediators are trained to deescalate conflict and improve communication.

Talk to close friends and family for advice and social support before you enter the mediation session. Some people also seek guidance from counselors who have experience with divorce. Do anything that you would normally do to reduce stress because stress is the last feeling you want right before a mediation. Negative emotions can slow down the agreement process.

Family Lawyer in Oklahoma

Try talking with an Oklahoma family lawyer if you have questions about mediation or if you have experienced unfair treatment by a mediator. A lawyer can offer advice on what you should do to attain the deal you want and ways to logically argue for your preferences when it comes to your children. In some cases, your lawyer may see something that can help you defend your stance. Contact the Putnam Law Office at (405)-849-9149 for a consultation today. Mr. Putnam is an Oklahoma City, OK attorney who puts clients first.